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Canis Pulsus Vol. 9 - Results - Canis Hoopus

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Ah! The sweet, sweet smell of the offseason where the Minnesota Timberwolves fanbase live like kings. Now that we’ve had a couple weeks to return from Cancún (or do y’all vacation at Lake Minnehaha?), it’s time to revisit those ol’ report cards that you all filled out.

Will the Timberwolves escape being academically disqualified since their semester 1 probation?

(Note: Canis Pulsus Vol. 9 data was collected by 5/20)

Karl-Anthony Towns

A- (34.8%)

Average: Between A- and B+

Previous grade: A- (33.3%)

The fact that Karl-Anthony Towns was able to survive till the end of the season without a mental breakdown is worth an A grade alone. However his consistent domination continued even through his difficult year where even Canis Hoopus felt he earned an A-. KAT was beginning to truly shine under a real head coach Coach Finch and according to my eye test, his defense was beginning to hit a stride. Cheers to a well-deserved offseason for Big KAT filled with no more unexpected or negative news.

Full voting results:

D’Angelo Russell

B- (25.8%)

Average: B-

Previous grade: D (15.6%)

D’Lo is telling Canis Hoopus to come back. His early season play, much connected to the loss of KAT, left the comments section calling for his head. Myself included. However ever since his knee scope, Russell has returned with a renewed sense of fervor. His willingness to commit to whatever Coach Finch asked of him was noticed, whether if it was to be an aggressive ball-mover, or to come off the bench. Big time respect to D’Lo for his turnaround late in the season!

Full voting results:

Ricky Rubio

B- (28.8%)

Average: C+

Previous grade: C (24.4%)

You knew it was just a matter of time before Canis Hoopus bumped our Spanish Unicorn back into a B-level grade. Although Ricky Rubio had career-worsts in many categories this season, it was still impossible for me not to smile knowing that I got to tune in to watch my favorite player don my favorite team’s uniform again. That said, even though his play was bad for his standards, he still had flashes of brilliance on the court. Perhaps most importantly was the positive effect that he’s had on Anthony Edwards. No matter what happens his offseason, we should all be forever grateful for that.

Full voting results:

Malik Beasley

B (33.3%)

Average: B

Previous grade: B (26.7%)

Ah... our poor NBA superstar, Malik Beasley. We were witnessing the continued breakout of one of the Timberwolves best shooting guards of all-time. It wasn’t until he went down with a surprising hamstring injury when we were robbed of the KAT, D’Lo, Ant, and Beas experience. That four-some may leave a lot to be desired on the defensive end, but the thought of the offensive brilliance that we’d see under Coach Finch’s system has left us all salivating. Here’s to hoping Malik can keep his off-the-court troubles at bay and return in full force next season.

Full voting results:

Anthony Edwards

A+ (28.8%)

Average: Between A- and A

Previous grade: B+ (27.3%)

The ascension of Anthony Edwards as the next crown jewel of the NBA is unstoppable. Ant earned himself sterling marks from the Canis faithful which is ascribed to both his play on the court as well as his value off the court (More on that later). He’s largely been the most consistently fun part of a very tumultuous season. His presence has also allowed us to enjoy Dave Benz dropping Ant facts all year. It’s true: A is for Ant.

Full voting results:

Juancho Hernangomez

C (27.3%)

Average: Between C and C-

Previous grade: C- (34.1%)

Perhaps no player enjoyed the coaching change more than Juancho Hernangomez. Although he still has a ways to go before he’s able to meet the expectations of the hefty 3-year $21M contract he signed last offseason, Juancho was able to instill some sense of faith here at Canis Hoopus. It’s unlikely that he’ll be the starting power forward of the future here, but he might’ve built some value around the league so that another team could be interested.

Full voting results:

Jarrett Culver

F (33.9%)

Average: D-

Previous grade: F (37.2%)

Damn. I was fully on the Jarrett Culver bandwagon from the start of draft night 2019. Even after an up-and-down rookie year (mostly down), I was still there. Now? I have to say that I’ve joined the rest of Canis Hoopus in our collective disappointment of the former #6 draft pick. It really felt like it was just between the ears for young JC, but it seems like things have finally hit an all-time low. He ended his sophomore campaign due to a season-ending ankle surgery and it might be a while until JC rises again.

Full voting results:

Ed Davis

Incomplete (28.8%)

Average: D+

Previous grade: Incomplete (40.0%)

Oh, what? Ed Davis is still here? I don’t know what we all really expected from him this season, but it appears he will not be joining the ranks of Christ Johnson, Jeff Adrien, Greg Stiemsma, or even Lou Amundson in Wolves lore. Ed played a career low 299 minutes this season and we didn’t get any cool stories about how much of a locker room figurehead he was.

Full voting results:

Jake Layman

C (28.8%)

Previous grade: C (40.9%)

Jake Layman will forever have fans here in Minnesota and I am proudly one of them. He has yet to really blow any of us away throughout his tenure thus far, but he’s had just enough blips in the radar to keep himself from being a true disappointment. In fact, there’s always been this itch every few games of “Is Jake Layman good and should we maybe play him more?” No matter what his role is moving forward, J_Lay_Lay will forever be heralded for his awesome poster dunks!

Full voting results:

Josh Okogie

B- (31.8%)

Average: C+

Previous grade: C (25.6%)

Chalk Josh Okogie as one of the many Wolves players who clawed his way back to respectability as the year went along. At one point early in the season, it looked like Non-Stop had come to a stop here at Canis Hoopus, but just like the tenacity he shows on the defensive end, JO grinded his way back into the rotation and meaningful minutes. It’s likely he’ll either be an important role player for the Wolves moving forward, or be an intriguing player that other teams may be interested in.

Full voting results:

Jaden McDaniels

A- (25.8%)

Average: Between A- and B+

Previous grade: B (24.4%)

Slendy / Big Mac / Gumby / Silky is here and he’s here to stay. Jaden McDaniels, much like his rookie counterpart, has been one of the most pleasant surprises of the entire season. Now considered a vital piece of the Wolves foundation, Jaden will continue to bless our viewing audience with more of his defensive brilliance and knockdown shooting moving forward. Everyone pray that Big Mac eats a ton of Big Mac’s (or something equally weight-inducing) this summer!

Full voting results:

Jarred Vanderbilt

B+ (40.9%)

Average: Between B+ and B

Previous grade: B- (31.1%)

At first, it appeared the young basketball career of Jarred Vanderbilt peaked early in the season. The Wolves were dead in the water and Coach Finch had hesitated to roll him out on a consistent basis. However Vando refused to accept his fate on the bench and continued to grind his way back into the rotation. The fan favorite may not be a foundational piece of the Wolves future, but he has certainly carved out a useful role.

Full voting results:

Naz Reid

B+ (37.9%)

Average: Between B+ and A-

Previous grade: B+ (26.7%)

Will Naz Reid go down as the best Timberwolves player of all time? Only time will tell. The undrafted big man out of LSU came into the season with much improved athleticism and efficiency. He has become a legit rim protector and played consistently all season, as evidenced by his season-long grades. One more time just for good measure:

Full voting results:

Jaylen Nowell

B- (25.8%)

Average: Between C+ and B-

Previous grade: B- (34.1%)

Mr. Big Tymah was on his way at the super 6th man that the Wolves needed. A scorer who could handle spot-PG duties. There was a stretch were Jaylen Nowell was truly becoming unlocked during Coach Finch’s first 13 games where he averaged 13.1 points on 50.4% shooting in just 24 minutes per game. However, as was typical for the ‘20-’21 Wolves, he suffered a leg injury that he never truly recovered from to end the season. His future in a Wolves uniform could be interesting depending on how the guard rotation shakes out this offseason, but it’s hard not to be encouraged by what we saw from the 2nd year player.

Full voting results:

Jordan McLaughlin

C (21.9%)

Average: Between C+ and C

Previous grade: C- (29.6%)

*insert ‘Look how they massacred my boy’ gif* The prodigal son of Canis Hoopus, Ricky Rubio Jordan McLaughlin, had a rough season from start to finish. He certainly had a few moments and above average games, but failed to recreate the magic that he had in his “rookie” season last year. Both D’Lo and Rubio also didn’t live up to our expectations, but JMac’s bar was significantly lower than those two PGs yet he still couldn’t clear it. His future in Minnesota is ominous moving forward.

Full voting results:

Coaching staff

A (39.4%)

Average: A-

Previous grade: B+ (31.1%)

After Ryan Saunders flunked out last semester, new student Chris Finch turned out to be everything Lil Flipper wasn’t. From drawing up multiple game winning plays, to getting one of his max players to play effectively off the bench, there has yet to be a feat that he can’t accomplish. I’ll leave the rest of my thoughts on Coach Finch to our talented WolvesCast crew!

Full voting results:

Front office

B+ (25.8%)

Average: Between B and B+

Previous grade: B- (40.0%)

In a weird, yet somehow hilarious turn of events this season, Gersson Rosas saw his grade rise from a D+ to a B+ without making a single roster move. Aside from waiving Ashton Hagans, the entire Wolves roster remained the same from the start of the season till the end. A rarity for a tinkerer like Rosas.

Full voting results:

Ownership

C (20.0%)

Average: Between C and C-

Previous grade: F (44.4%)

I believe the file name for that GIF above is “New_owner_high_fiving_old_owner.GIF” Is it too early to file a petition for a grade change? After being well on his way to flunk the entire season, Glen Taylor finally did the unthinkable and sold the team while finding a way to invoke a clause to keep them in Minnesota! That shot his grade all the way up to an astonishing C. But of course, as is the case with anything here: It’s the Timberwolves, Jake.

Full voting results:

The MVP of the Wolves was...

Karl-Anthony Towns (71%)

No surprises here. Big KAT reeled in nearly all the votes here with Ant picking up nearly a quarter of the remains. If you take a look back at our Canis Hoopus’ pre-season predictions, you’ll be reminded that 90% of us thought KAT would be the MVP. The remaining 10% were split among Ricky Rubio, D’Angelo Russell, Jake Layman (!), Jarrett Culver (!!), and Ashton Hagans (!!!). Kudos to the rook!

Full voting results:

The DPOY of the Wolves was...

Jaden McDaniels (74%)

Would you have believed at the start of the season that this unassuming stick figure above would be the Timberwolves best defensive player? If you did, you’d be lying. I got the receipts. 43% of Canis Hoopus thought Jarrett Culver would be our DPOY heading into the season. In fact, out of all 8 players who received votes in that prediction, the only player who ended up receiving a vote at the end of the season was Josh Okogie (14%). All hail our new defensive overlord, Big Mac.

Full voting results:

The 6MOY of the Wolves was...

D’Angelo Russell (48%)

This was quite an interesting result. Although I too voted for D’Lo as our 6MOY, I didn’t expect the majority to follow suit. As much as we have complained about Russell’s play this season, I think we can all truthfully acknowledge that he was absolutely great off the bench. Now, should a player on a max salary be coming off the bench in that role? Maybe, maybe not. Will we continue seeing D’Lo as our permanent Lou Williams moving forward? Probably not. But it was fun while it lasted. Shoutout to the one voter who gave Malik Beasley a vote for the one game he came off the bench due to missing shootaround.

Full voting results:

The MIP of the Wolves was...

Naz Reid (68%)

I hate to be that guy who keeps pulling up old stuff (I actually don’t hate it), but 44% of Canis Hoopus predicted Jarrett Culver to be the league-wide MIP. The truth hurts. However what doesn’t hurt is Naz Reid’s continued progression towards being an extremely effective NBA player. Finch was wild enough to take the KAT-Naz line-up out for a spin and although I’m too lazy to pull the numbers up, I’m pretty sure that pairing was ranked #1 amongst two-man pairings in the entire world. Don’t @ me.

Full voting results:

The ROY of the Wolves was...

Anthony Edwards (94%)

My b, I forgot to include Leandro Bolmaro.

Full voting results:

Your All-Timberwolves 1st Team would be...

Karl-Anthony Towns (100%)

Anthony Edwards (97%)

Jaden McDaniels (88%)

D’Angelo Russell (59%)

Malik Beasley (52%)

Some fun results here. KAT, Ant, and Jaden were all a head above the rest in earning all-Wolves 1st team votes. Then there was a clear 2nd tier, being D’Lo, Malik, and Naz, before being rounding out with Ricky, Vando, Okogie, and Jake Layman?? Either way, this made for a nice even 10 players who received votes so an all-Wolves 2nd team could be made. Which team do you think would win if they played each other?

Full voting results:

The best locker room presence was...

Ricky Rubio (47%)

55% of Canis Hoopus predicted Ricky to be the best locker room presence at the start of the season and it appears they were spot on. If you click on that link to view the results from 6 months ago, your eyes will be blessed to see the name Rondae Hollis-Jefferson (Currently playing a few meaningful minutes for the playoff Blazers) again. Although Ant did receive 10% of votes in December, he has obviously turned out to be much more important to the locker room than we ever thought he’d be.

Full voting results:

The player who impressed the most was...

Anthony Edwards (67%)

Once again, CH nailed their prediction. Ant continues to rake in awards, as 43% of you voted for Ant in this category prior to the start of the season. Meanwhile, the preseason prediction is another reminder of that guy named Jarrett Culver who played basketball once upon a time.

Full voting results:

My favorite player on the roster was...

Anthony Edwards (54%)

I was shocked to see the results of this. Though I love Ant and anticipated him in the top 3, if not 2, in this category, I did not see him usurping our beloved Ricky Rubio already. However I couldn’t pick a more worthy player to take Ricky’s crown as the CH favorite. It’s clear that his unicorn dust has spread to Mr. Edwards and I’m totally here for it.

Full voting results:

Will the Timberwolves make the playoffs next year?

Yes (68%)

Here we go again, baby. Death, taxes, and Wolves offseason optimism! We’re just constantly spinning on this merry-go-around of doom and we will never learn. Isn’t that why we’re all here on Canis Hoopus? 82-0, here we come!

Full voting results:

Heading into the offseason, my feelings on the direction of the Timberwolves are...

Very/Slightly optimistic (90%)

Previous grade: Slightly pessimistic (44.4%)

Full voting results:

Link to the full results: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1fXBHhzNGyDkBHCm3WXzeh5TCxhLCKCTz7YrTX38UN5A/edit?usp=sharing

The Wolves finally got the tutoring they needed and bumped their first semester 1.88 GPA up to a 2.62. With momentum at yet another all-time high, this means Canis Pulsus will keep it going. Stay tuned for Canis Pulsus Vol. 10 - Lottery Edition!

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Canis Pulsus Vol. 9 - Results - Canis Hoopus
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